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Poopy diapers

November 25, 2009

This past weekend Queenie learned to wag her forefinger in front of her face as she said, “NO!” Man, can she say no with definition and authority! She will make a good mom. Maybe that means I’m being a good mom? Hmmmm. I’d like to think so even though I got frustrated today that my two year old didn’t understand how to turn her handle bars to the LEFT, NOT THE RIGHT! Then I had to step back and remind myself that she doesn’t know what I am saying much less why I am getting frustrated. Perhaps that is why she only rode it half-way through our walk and then didn’t want to get back on…..But I made up for it by letting her watch two cartoons while eating lunch. Yes, I’m a good mommy….!

Anyway, the point of this post is to ask: Why is it that toddlers don’t want their poopy diapers changed? Is it a control issue? Is it just to push mama’s buttons since they always seem to poop just as you are trying to get out the door? This morning it took about half an hour to get Queenie’s absolutely purtid diaper off of her. The first time I asked her to get a diaper she said “NO!” and ran away laughing. Then I came after with a diaper and she used her new trick of finger wagging at me. Why do I bother asking her you want to know? Because many times she will come after a few minutes and get it changed. She is at the point now where she won’t sit down if she has poop, but she will still run, bend and slide down the slide. When I have to wrestle her down it usually becomes a frustrating mess and I normally get poop where I don’t want it. So, I ask.

But today asking didn’t work.

Neither did pleading. You should have seen me. Had you seen me you would have thought that I lived to change poopy diapers. As if I wake up every morning jumping for joy that another 24 hours has passed and I once again get to wipe nasty, spongy feces from my daughter’s butt. Not that I mind it. It is in my job description. But I am definitely not one of those who volunteers to wipe any other child’s butt. Not even nieces or nephews. My MIL is. In fact, all of the brothers have made fun of her for it because her enthusiasim is such that it make you suspect that she likes the smell. Now, I know it isn’t that she gets pleasure from smelling the waste product of what her grandchild ate the day before more than she likes having a moment or two to herself with her grandchildren where she can sing and play without her sons making fun of her. I get that. What I don’t get is her informing me later about the quantity, color and texture of said diaper. That I don’t get. Nor do I understand why I would want to know or why she looks. I don’t look. I immediately wipe down with the diaper as much as possible and wipe said butt as quickly as possible. I don’t want to know how much there was or argue about what it means to have chunks or for it to be yellow instead of brown. Apparenlty this was all very important 30 years ago when her children wore diapers.

Digressing…..

I finally got the diaper off, got no poop on the floor, although I did get it on my hands, and finally into the garbage. And then my kitchen smelled. So we went outside in order to throw away said nastiness. But, in the spirit of Thanksgiving, I have to say that I am grateful my daughter chooses morning time to do her business in order to allow me time to throw the garbage out before it makes my kitchen smell like a landfill.

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