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Fingers in the wrong places

January 25, 2010

Did you ever think about the dignity that you lose at the end of pregnancy and, of course, in the birth? How many people within those two months see our vaginas and stick their fingers up them? It’s really disturbing when you think about it that way, isn’t it? The place that is supposed to be the most private on your body suddenly becomes the focus of many people’s attention. Something that your mother always told isn’t supposed to be touched except by you or your husband (my mother was a dreamer…but that’s what I’ll be telling Queenie and little N!) ( I just have to add a side note here that Queenie is dusting my house with baby wipes, and doing a spectacular job. My judgement might be a bit turned around since I don’t dust….) is suddenly being felt over by so many different people’s fingers that you lose count.

I am to that point in the pregnancy. Getting past the point of the penis-like ultrasound wand (UGH!) is always my number one goal, which I was happy to find was much easier on the second pregnancy than the first. With Queenie I had the joy of getting that penis wand stuck up me four time because they could never find her without it! Now I am at the monitoring part, the “Let me stick my fingers up you to see if you are dialated” part. Ick.

(I would like to interrupt here just to say that I have just noticed I only put deodorant on one armpit today….)

One good thing is that I really feel like Little N is going to come sooner than her internet inspired due date of April 6. (My doc never gave me an official date. She said she doesn’t find it important since they can come whenever they want!) Why do I think this? Just from the way she is moving. She is super low right now. So low at 30 weeks that I feel her fingers move across my pelvic floor. A freaky, icky sensation in my book. I also have certain pains that I only had at the very end with Queenie and I am starting to have contractions. Not big ones and very sporadic, but contractions all the same. To the point that I have started to refuse to pick up Queenie. Me, the mama who did weight lifting until just a few weeks ago (when these weird signs started and I thought I should slow down a bit) who refused to stop wearing a baby sling with my toddler in it until I was 23 weeks along and simply couldn’t anymore. Me, the one who used to roll her eyes at my SIL because from the day she found out she was pregnant she stopped picking up her one year old.

We shall see one week from today what my new doc thinks. Yes, that’s right, I have a doctor! Yea! An English speaking doctor at that who works in the second best clinic to give birth in in France! Their c-section rate is only 15% and they have water baths for birth. Don’t know if I’ll get one, but they have them! There is one little glitch that we have to get smoothed out in the next few days, though: the clinic is private. So we aren’t sure if our Spanish and private insurance combination will cover a birth there. They claim that their birth costs are lower, so maybe it will work out in our favor, but that has more to do with bureaucracy than anything else. So, while awaiting a call or email from the insurance company, we will dream the big dream of going to the second best place in France. With an English speaking doctor. And if it doesn’t work out it will really be too late to care about anything else other than finding a doctor, so……here’s hoping it works out!

3 Comments leave one →
  1. January 26, 2010 5:39 am

    Hi! I’m visiting from MBC. Great blog.

    • wideopenworld permalink*
      January 28, 2010 9:36 am

      Nice to see you!

  2. Julie permalink
    January 29, 2010 3:35 am

    It is amazing how by the end of a pregnancy (e.g. time for the birth), you are so immune to having “fingers in the wrong places”! You don’t even care anymore. With my son’s birth (which was such a blessing – only 5 hours, all natural), I was just happy for him to “get out”. I didn’t care how many people were poking around down there (for the record, I think there were 4 – my obstetrician, 2 midwives and my husband!)

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